I was wheeled from the street into the birthing centre and all I could do was stare at this little creature in my arms. I don’t even remember who was around me or what I said or did but once we got to the birthing centre I thought it was over.
I had completely forgotten about my placenta and so had my body. My midwife told me to push out my placenta and I had no idea how to push, as I hadn’t needed to do this to get the baby out. My contractions had stopped. They brought Josef to my chest to latch and create the oxytocin needed to release the afterbirth. It didn’t work.
They flipped me on all fours, and then stood me up, still nothing. It was like a smaller version of labour. Finally they brought in a doctor from the OR. My placenta was tightly attached to my uterus and was not letting go. I had to go into surgery. After a drug free birth I was injected with a spinal, a drip of pitocin and something to relax my uterus. My legs started to numb and tingle and were lifted up into stir-ups.
I started to panic, the sensation of not feeling my legs was so strange. My placenta was attached to the top of my uterus so you can imagine how far the surgeon had to reach in to detach it. I could feel all the pushing and pulling in my abdomen. It took 15 mins but luckily it came out whole and healthy.
They tore me in the procedure so had to give me stitches. I was wheeled back to recovery and for the first time I was alone. I was empty, there was no one around and I couldn’t move from the waist down. It felt horrible and scary. Luckily after 20 mins Mark and Josef were allowed to join me and my heart was full again.
Finally together as a family, a team of 3.
I was separated from Josef for most of the first day of his life, as he had to go under the UV lights that night as well. I’m still processing this and am surprised by the impact it has had on me. I realized the other day that other than in the Taxi I had never held him fully naked until his first sponge bath or kissed his little bottom. He is growing so fast and I already want time to slow down. He’s definitely a lesson in enjoying every moment.
❤️ Thank you all for reading. 🙏 @ New York, New York